Have you ever felt so overwhelmed, either physically or mentally, that you thought you would never feel better? It’s a hard place to be, and it’s easy to get stuck in the belief that this situation is permanent, leading to a sense of doom. It’s challenging to see the bigger picture in these moments—that all feelings are temporary, much like the weather.
Just as the weather changes, our emotions will blow through like the clouds do. We often forget that the storm clouds of our minds can and will pass. It’s essential to remember that no emotion is permanent. This understanding is critical in managing our mental health and fostering resilience.
A few months ago, I wrote an article discussing how resilience helps lift us up when our moods get low. In that article, we talked about how self-care practices are crucial in lifting us up so we avoid getting stuck in the downward slope of our emotions.
This week, we will explore another way to get unstuck with the concepts of Fusion and Defusion from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT).
It’s important to note that this discussion isn’t about pushing emotions away or avoiding them. Instead, it’s about accepting and understanding our emotions without letting them dictate our actions. Acknowledging our feelings and allowing ourselves to experience them fully leads to a deeper sense of awareness and personal growth. Rather than letting emotions overtake us, we can experience them without getting hooked, making it easier to move through them efficiently.
Fusion and Defusion
Fusion occurs when our thoughts dominate our behavior, leading to self-defeating or problematic actions. In other words, our thoughts negatively influence our actions and awareness, making it difficult to recognize that our feelings are not permanent. This can result in feeling stuck in a negative thought pattern, making it difficult to move forward.
On the other hand, defusion means detaching from our thoughts and not getting caught up in them. It’s about observing our thoughts without letting them control our behavior. This practice allows us to gain perspective and act according to our values or what we want to move toward rather than staying stuck in our emotions.
Tips for Managing Tough Emotional Storms
Based on the six self-care practices of Life Ideals, here are some tips for managing tough emotional storms:
1. Mindfulness and Relaxation:
Mindfulness and relaxation techniques can help ground you in the present moment, making riding out the emotional storm easier. Techniques like deep breathing, meditation, and progressive muscle relaxation can be very effective. These practices help you stay anchored and calm, providing a buffer against overwhelming emotions.
2. Thought Defusion:
Instead of thinking, “I will never feel better,” try shifting your perspective to, “This feeling is temporary, and just as I’ve had tough times before, I will also get through this.” Practicing defusion techniques from ACT, such as observing your thoughts without judgment, can help reduce their power over you. This shift in perspective allows you to see thoughts as transient events rather than absolute truths.
3. Social Connection:
Reaching out to friends, family, or a support group can provide comfort and remind you that you’re not alone. Sometimes, just talking about your feelings can be a significant relief. You may hesitate to impose on a friend when emotions peak due to intense feelings. In such cases, journaling can help discharge emotions, allowing you to communicate more calmly and effectively.
4. Adequate Sleep:
Good sleep is essential for emotional regulation. Ensure your sleep environment is conducive to rest, and maintain a regular sleep schedule. When thoughts are too challenging to sleep, avoid staying in bed while ruminating for more than 20 minutes. Get up, do some gentle stretches or quiet meditation, and then return to bed. This helps reset your mind and body for better sleep.
5. Physical Activity:
Exercise is a powerful tool for improving mood and reducing stress. Even a short walk in nature can help clear your mind and provide a new perspective on your problems. Physical activity releases endorphins, which act as natural mood lifters and stress relievers.
6. Healthy Nutrition:
Eating a balanced diet can profoundly impact your mental and physical well-being. Avoid excessive caffeine and sugar, which can exacerbate anxiety and mood swings. Opt for nutrient-dense foods that support brain health and stabilize blood sugar levels, aiding in emotional regulation.
Remember, like the weather, our feelings are constantly changing. By incorporating self-care practices into our daily routine, we can build resilience and navigate tough times more effectively. Embrace the temporary nature of emotions and trust that better days are ahead with time and self-care.
